How to do a microchip implant, why read package inserts, who are cyborgs, why carry keys and cards, and how to shock cashiers?

Cyborg (short for cybernetic organism) is a biological organism containing mechanical or electronic inserts, a machine-human hybrid (in science fiction, hypothetical science fiction, etc.).

Scary, isn’t it? But I thought it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to become a cyborg. If you have a chip in your hand that opens doors, you don’t have to carry your keys with you. And if you can pay with it, then you’ve got rid of a bunch of cards, too! “All that is mine I carry with me”. That’s convenient.

So, it’s decided, I’m going cyborg! I do my research, find a “reliable” RFID chip manufacturer, order a tiny device the size of a grain of rice, and find a “surgeon” willing to implant the iron into my flesh.

And it was really funny:

Now, when I magically open doors with my hand, I produce a strong impression on random witnesses, and questions like “Did I take my keys with me?” cease to make sense.

Next step is to think about how I might pay with a tap of my finger on the terminal, say in a low voice: “I’ll be back” and, with the gait of a robot, walk off into the sunset, while the cashier stares at the scene with her mouth agape.